Grief Support with Sister Pat Fesler
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Sister Pat Fesler, a grief support professional and familiar face around Zion, will be offering support groups at Zion.
Please check the calendar for our next meetings. Groups are available for Spouses, Parents, and Kids ages 6-12 to sign up call the church office. If you would like to meet with Sister Pat privately, please call for an appointment. Sister Pat is also available to meet with anyone who would like to go over liturgy, scripture readings, etc. to keep on file here at the church for funeral planning.
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GRIEVING and REMEMBERING
During COVID19, I would imagine all or most of us have experienced the death of a loved one whether it be family or friend. I do not mean that death was necessarily from COVID but it could have been anything. How very difficult that is especially with all that is going on in our world. So many people ask how do I grieve, how do I celebrate that person, how do I remember? Remembering the love that person gave us along with all of the other things you did with them is so very important. You may ask yourself what song, book, movie, story, holiday, food, vacation, etc remind you of that person. Whatever it is, write about that and share it with your family and or friends. I heard a young woman sharing on NPR about her grandmother and the song that reminded her of her was a song by John Denver. She played it and talked about her. We can do the same thing with our family and friends with whatever it is that touched their hearts and makes us remember. We may ask ourselves what special way will we remember that person who has died during this difficult time in our lives. So very often we do not allow ourselves to go back to one of those special things and let it give us special strength and peace. Grieving is a part of life that is different for each of us and different with each death we experience. Each of us deals with it differently and there is no set time for anyone. We do, however, need to deal with our grief because if we do not it will come knocking on our door years later. “I know how to do this. My child, husband, wife, sibling, parents, friend has died.” Very often none of us know how to do this. We grapple with so many tools and don’t know which one to use. Don’t be afraid to tell your story and sometimes you will find yourself telling it over and over. You may find a new best friend who will listen to you as often as you want to tell your story. They will not say to you “enough is enough just move on already.” Telling our story and remembering is healing. Anyone that knows me knows that I am not a person who recommends a lot of books. Very often people can’t concentrate when they are grieving. There are two small books, however, that I do recommend “The ABC’S of Healthy Grieving” by Harold Ivan Smith and “Winter of the Heart” by Paula D’Arcy. They are compact and provide some tools you may need physically, emotionally and spiritually. Death affects every part of our lives and we find ourselves going up and down the ladder. When we are grieving it is so very important to eat a healthy diet and exercise. Other things you might find helpful are journaling, music, crafting, baking or finding something that fits. I have had so many people that have picked up new crafts and have done some phenomenal things such as: 5D Diamond Painting, playing an instrument, composing music, crocheting, knitting, quilting, adult coloring books, drawing, painting, sewing, writing your loved ones life story to pass on etc. Do not be afraid to try something new and don’t think you have no ability when it comes to crafts. We all do. Your spirituality may change. You may find yourself angry with God and that is ok. You will not be angry forever. Try to build in some time for you and God. When we feel, we can’t reach out to anyone why not reach out to that person who walks with us every single day. If you are grieving the death of a loved one, how are you going to deal with it or are you going to ignore it and shelf it because it’s too painful at this time? Don’t be afraid; the road is rocky but you never travel it alone. Reach out for help and guidance it’s there for you. Pat Fesler, HM February 23, 2021 |
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